I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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