If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
People in love make me want to vomit
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
