if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
