Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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