New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
