No stitches, just platelets and will power
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
