You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
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