ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize
