Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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