Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
