i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
