We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
did i just pee glitter
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