HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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