Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
