So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
