If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
There's even glitter on my cock...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
