What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
