THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I have post one night stand depression
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