it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
