I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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