So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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