jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
