Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
