Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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