Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
