He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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