We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
