He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
