Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Damn victory sex feels great
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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