Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
