My brain says no but my pants say off.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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