if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
nutella sex= disaster
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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