I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
