So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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