its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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