I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I'm passing your future prison.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
