Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
