Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
