Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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