You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
