Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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