she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
