Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
We are two peas in an std pod
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
