Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
