I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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