Well apparently he's into motor boating.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
