sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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