Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
