I feel like I'm in dance class right now
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
