I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
